What's your worst physical injury

[bishopkris40]

Ok mine aren't as good but.

1) When I was younger I was walking over a bridge 12 feet above a footpath (on wrongside of safety barrier) started to speak to someone on the path and body followed my vision, ended up face first in to ground, but bounced and also hit my leg before all coming down in one big heap. Scrapped all the skin off my forehead, samshed my front tooth, woke the next morning to 2 black eyes that were swollen shut. Took 6 weeks to get over the worst. But everyone who saw it still thinks it's the funniest thing ever, (not for me) I now have a slightly squint foot, but only noticed when I tried to snowboard and my foot started to hurt when trying to keep it straight.

2) When enjoing a wank from a girl when I was 17 in my car she got carried away and pulled too hard on my skin, it then ripped from the bit that attatches the foreskin to the top all the way down until it is even. The pain was bad but not half as bad as trying to pee after it. (Explain that to your Mum when she asks whats wrong. I know have something that resemble the skin under a roosters beak.

3)Punched someone and broke my knuckle.

4) Was sitting up the top of a tree, next to a dead one. Friend decided he wanted to come up and see what I was looking at, as he did I had to strech my leg to another branch almost the splits. The prick put all his wait on one of the braches, it snapped and we both fell, all the way down about 25 feet, I hit every branch (with legs still open) I fell in to a field and removed the branches only to feel the dull pain and then feel something dripping, dropped my trousers and My balls were bleeding, but my friend was still up the tree, hanging upside down from the ankle stuck in the tree. I soooo wanted to leave him. Balls ok now (No kidz and 27, hmmm ihope their ok)

5)Took a bad turn on mushrooms in my house, stood at top of stairs in my house and dived head first down them, (You know I think I made it all the way. Smashed up house. Woke up with grazes, cuts, brusies. Broken nose from my dad when he came in and found house smashed. Man I hate mushrooms. Seriously don't mess with wild shrooms (well not a brew with over 1500 in it)

Think that's it

[AlexHall74]

Originally Posted by bishopkris40

Ok mine aren't as good but.

1) When I was younger I was walking over a bridge 12 feet above a footpath (on wrongside of safety barrier) started to speak to someone on the path and body followed my vision, ended up face first in to ground, but bounced and also hit my leg before all coming down in one big heap. Scrapped all the skin off my forehead, samshed my front tooth, woke the next morning to 2 black eyes that were swollen shut. Took 6 weeks to get over the worst. But everyone who saw it still thinks it's the funniest thing ever, (not for me) I now have a slightly squint foot, but only noticed when I tried to snowboard and my foot started to hurt when trying to keep it straight.

2) When enjoing a wank from a girl when I was 17 in my car she got carried away and pulled too hard on my skin, it then ripped from the bit that attatches the foreskin to the top all the way down until it is even. The pain was bad but not half as bad as trying to pee after it. (Explain that to your Mum when she asks whats wrong. I know have something that resemble the skin under a roosters beak.

3)Punched someone and broke my knuckle.

4) Was sitting up the top of a tree, next to a dead one. Friend decided he wanted to come up and see what I was looking at, as he did I had to strech my leg to another branch almost the splits. The prick put all his wait on one of the braches, it snapped and we both fell, all the way down about 25 feet, I hit every branch (with legs still open) I fell in to a field and removed the branches only to feel the dull pain and then feel something dripping, dropped my trousers and My balls were bleeding, but my friend was still up the tree, hanging upside down from the ankle stuck in the tree. I soooo wanted to leave him. Balls ok now (No kidz and 27, hmmm ihope their ok)

5)Took a bad turn on mushrooms in my house, stood at top of stairs in my house and dived head first down them, (You know I think I made it all the way. Smashed up house. Woke up with grazes, cuts, brusies. Broken nose from my dad when he came in and found house smashed. Man I hate mushrooms. Seriously don't mess with wild shrooms (well not a brew with over 1500 in it)

Think that's it

Damn Bro!!!

I'd say your right at the top of the list in many regards!

You might want to get your sperm count checked, just in case.

Take care,

-Alex

[Doc Jones]

goooooood lord . . .
these stories are horrible!!

[bishopkris40]

Alex
I check it myself almost daily, just keep falling asleep after counting to 10

Nut's not worrying my too much at the moment, will wait until I'm ready for kids, then I have the best excuse for a mid life crisis. (New synths car and fast women, with no birth control, saying that my usual women I'll probably still need disease control)

Saying that Once I had a dose of genital warts from some dirty bitch (Were a bloody condom!) You know they freeze you knob with liquid nitrogen, then put some acid gunk on and then this guy used another thing. (Later spoke to another Dr that told me normal practice is just 1 of them, but my Dr knew best ;( ) Then they tell you not to forget to wash it off in 8 hours!!!!!
Well one day I forgot and about 9 hours sitting at dinner with my folks things started to get a little hot down there so I rushed to toilet to clean myself, OUCH!!!!! !! It took about 6 weeks of this once a week. I'm all clear now and assured all is fine down there.

But man I'm always safe now.

So now you know you'll never get the 3o3 style pictures from me lol

Hmmm did I really just admit that.

oh and the dirty bitch contacted me through friends re-united a couple of years back asking how I was and wondering if we could meet..... Well she got told, even funnier when telling a bloke at the place I worked at that time a women asked if I know her daughter.... lol I never had the heart to tell her she waas the same girl I had just been talking about. Now I work 80 miles from my home town

[3o3]

Bishop: I've also suffer from an peeled banana if I say so! But that story is so insane I couldn't tell it here.. and hopefully from telling my other stories you know this one is bad! People still laugh about it as it could be an scene directly from "American Pie"

I've got a major scar from the accident! But I've been lucky and never gotten any genital warts or anything like that!

Doc: Admit it! You only think these stories are horrible as these are everyday events for you, and you'd always thought that "smashing me nuts while lighting my torso on fire" is a good first-date option?! Hehe.

Hey another great story, which I can't tell is an accident or what yet;

Last Saturday I was invited to come party with my tattooartist as they had their "1-year anniversary" He has been tattooing for the last 15 years but never had his own studio.. They've also started with piercing! So I get there, I promise Ausa that I won't drink that much. I drink two beers for 2 hours..

I wake up 05:20 in the bathtub still in my tshirt and boxershorts.. I wake up because I accidently turn the cold water on!, first thought: Holy mother.. Now i've got some major things to explain! It did hurt quite alot from my nipple.. Ärsch, I just wanted to get to bed again..

I woke up around noon-ish.. I still had that pain in my nipple when all of the sudden I get this flash from yesterday! I pierced my nipple! I pull up my shirt thinking "Nah, I didn't do that.." Well.. I did! Now I got both my nipples pierced (which is great.. *wink wink hubba hubba* if you're ladies know how to get the freak on.. which I mean hanging you from the ceiling while chanting rhytmic A-B-C-D-E-F.. How I wonder what come's next and then a smack on you're bottom and off you go to orgasmowonderland!)

I had such an hangover on Sunday from the day before, and yes. I had quite much explaining to do.. It's insane how I didn't remember anything as from what I recall I only had ~6 small beers (which is nothing really)! I talked to my tattooartist yesterday; "Erhm, you were pretty weird.. First you were fine.. Didn't even look like you were drunk and 10 minutes later you couldn't even talk".

Never get any bodymods while under influence of alcohol or else you'll end up in your bathtub, still wearing your underwear and later on find out that you womited all over the place..

[Old Vantaa Man]

Some amazing stories here. I like Seb's Beavis and Butthead escapade in the hospital where his mate tried to split his skull with a rock!

Alex's leg in a rabbit hole makes my buttcheeks clench each time I even think about it.

But brewing 1500 mushrooms and flying off the top of the stairs.. Plus the rest of these confessions from Chris Bishop here... I nearly had an accident laughing so much.

ARISE SIR BISH!

[bishopkris40]

I must admit I should keep more secrets, but feck it, life's for living.

Must say shrooms was probably worst experience of my life, but the dive down the stairs is still so clear in my head 12 years on. I counted the stairs and there are 13, unlucky for some lol.

Safe to say now I don't take shrooms, don't dive from large heights and only sleep with one clean(ish) women my wellies to bed

[Hollowcell]

Originally Posted by 3o3

HC: How did you dislocate your leg?

It was a horrible Skateboarding accident. The worst one I ever had hands down, and that counts crushing nuts a few times on handrails - now that says something!