What's your worst physical injury
 

I've just pulled a massive shard of broken glass out of my foot.
Hmm. Not the worst though.
6 years ago I tripped on a railway line and bust 2 front teeth. Yes, I was pretty drunk.
Bust an ankle in a fight in 1987. Yup. Drunk again.
Heart was broken in 1979 by that bitch Amanda. I blame the above on her.

How about you boys?

uh, some broken bones here and there...
regards, Lorenzo

Oh boy...not in order:

(1) Sprained my ankle in 1992 racing my brother across a field when a fireworks show was going off on the 4th of July. I was well in the lead and then my foot found its way into a goddamn rabbit hole. It snapped like a cold stick on a winter morning. My whole leg was brusied/sprained purple from my foot all the way to my knee. Back at the lake house my brother's friend poured me a huge galss of bourbon and told me I should soak myu foot in gasoline so the ants wouldn't crawl up my leg and eat my candy ass off. Then he rolled a Bob Marley special and played a few hands of poker with me and my bro. The next day we took our girls to New York City and tromped around Greenwich Village. My foot hurt for 2 months!

(2) Lower back injury; 2 herniated disks. Fucking ouch. Car accident, I'll never forget it. My life has not been the same since, but its still pretty damn good.

(3) Rotator cuff injuries on both shoulders over 1.5 years. Ouch! Power lifting has taken its toll on poor Alex in his 28th year. No sleeping, no picking up my kids, no nothing until after physical therapy.

(4) I chafed my left testicle on my desk today...

You decide what order they should be in.

;)

uhhmmm Alex . . . .

how did you pull of #4??



on second thought,
never mind.

Torn abdominal muscle playing high school football.

(I should have joined the chess club instead)

Cool! So many questions, though mate..

Where? At home? What time? What were you doing? Why were your bollocks hanging out? Does the edge of your desk need sanding down?

This is a great excuse to post a pic of your balls on the internet here, Alex.

A few years back I was drunk as hell, wanted a sandwich, so hopped on my bike. it was a downhill bike, worthless pos, unless your flying down a 15% grade. Anyway, 2am in the morning dark as all hell, I'm whizzing down a small hill, I'm going at least 20 mph before I hit the hill, took a corner too sharp hit the gravel, bam, straight to the moon! When I hit, not a bit of my body touched the ground just my face. the whole right side of my face was scraped off, I looked like that Batman character Two-face, walked my bike and bloodly ass face 2 miles home. Sat in front of the mirror for an hour with a bottle of Vodka(disinfectant) and a stiff toothbrush and cleaned all the gravel out of my face. Should of worn a helmet. Now all I have is a 3cm scar under my noise, I account that to dam fine Russian Vodka. worse part? No sandwich;-)

Haha! Ooo fuck! Nice going Ian!

yep, good thing I've gotten into synths & the like. had to calm that adolescence dumb-ass streak I'm still trying to over-come. I'm getting to F'ing old.

Never broken a bone, never sprained an ankle, never been stung by a bee...

Some may say Im cautious, other say just a pussy

Erhm.. Where to start?

(No order whatsoever)

1. Broke my collar bone while racing my friend. As I was winning he tripped me from behind and I fell into a dumpster and it at first didn't really hurt that much but it was more of an chock of hearing the bone break and realizing that I couldn't lift my arm up into the air and after 10 seconds the pain come.

2. While at daycare centre, I was trying to perform an stunt ala "some action movie I've seen the day before", anyways I didn't get out in time and smashed back of my head against an electrical outlet.. It didn't hurt at all! Anyways all that happened was that my sight was kinda blurry so I went to the first personel of the daycare centre.. but as she fainted when she saw me, I got kinda scared and thought that some monster was chasing me and as the second personel just looked at me and screamed my fullon panic was an fact. So I turned around to run back to the room and hide when I saw this trail of blood and I got even an worse panicattack and when I put my hand on the back of my head I could acctually feel my own skull. Then I heard someone screaming in panic and after 30 seconds I realized that it was acctually me, that stood and screamed like an crazy person. It took 2 hours to stitch me up!

3. I was tripped by an friend in school and landed on my frontteeth directly on marblefloor. That hurt like hell and even worse when the bloody dentist decided that "You're an big boy and don't need any painkiller whatsoever while he bloody drilled my "nerve" (I have no idea what the english word is..). I still have two "dracula"-teeth because of that accident.

4. When I got into an fight and got my hand thrue and window causing major damage to nerves and muscles (and I still suffer from it)

5. When I freaked out and smashed my _other_ hand into an concretewall and breaking it like an twig.

6. When I freaked out once more and smashed the already broken hand into the wall again causing even more damage.

That is just a few accidents I can remember right now, want more stories?!

"If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough"

Blimey, some pretty grisly stories there.

Worst I've suffered is attempting to jump over a row of leylandi (those fucking awful evergreen conifer type things) as a short cut, thought I'd cleared them but my foot got caught and my head bore the full brunt and weight of my body as I hit the pavement the other side.

Was a beautiful wound, skin scraped right off from the top of my head right down the forehead to the bottom of the nose, and full of lovely grit. Literally saw stars, and the ringing in my ears was loud as fuck. Guess it was karma, as I was actually pegging it after knock-a-door-running some guy's house (I was only about 13. beh). No physical scars left, but I still have the tinnitus. Would trade that for a physical scar any day.

Got a shit load of scars from various operations, but that's maybe for another time...

Sebastian. One day, and it is coming, I am going to come to Stockholm for an almighty session with you my mate.
Or if you wanna come here.. Let's go and bust that fucking Juho's apartment.

I had an in-growing toenail once.

I once rolled a car off a cliff.

Got a slight graze on my right elbow...

broke the same arm twice
cuncussion -smacked my head hard on the curb skateboarding
I had the gears of the bike go into my leg had stitches for that
huge stone hit my forehead also got stitches for that

A few busted bones here, lots of scrapes and stitches, but the worst pain I have ever been in was when I dislocated my leg from my hip! Fuck me it took a long time to get back to normal after that.

matsa: Sounds like a plan then!

HC: How did you dislocate your leg?

I remember a few more good stories (I got too much to tell about really but if you want more.. I will happily tell you more);

I was playing with an "friend" (hoho, that sounds really dirty doesn't it? anyways..) we got bored and decided to go to an hospital and steal an wheelchair as we usually did and since we've been there so many times stealing wheelchairs they knew who we was and knew that we wouldn't destroy the thing and it could be found just outside the doors.

However, the doors wouldn't open so we started to walk back home again. All of the sudden my "friend" stopped and said; "Hey, check this out!" so I went back to him and wanted to see what he had seen that was "sooooooooo intresting". He pointed into a pool of mud and said look at the bottom of that! So I tried really hard to see what on earth could be so intresting in the pool.

While I tried to figure it out he picked up an massive razorsharp rock. Just as I was about to turn my head and ask what the hell I why I stared down the mudpool with no funny "thing" whatsoever.

It was like an flash, as someone had taken an photo just next to me.. Then it's black! I woke up just as my brother screamed as an madman chasing my "friend" away from me.

As it turned out, my "friend" just had gotten bored and decided that he wanted to see how it was to beat someone really bad or maybe even kill someone. But as I was lucky my brother came walking by just that area we were, just as my "friend" smashed the stone on my head and knocking me out. I got an massive concussion aswell as I had to get ~25 stitches (I got some scars in the back of me head!).

My brother got hold of my "friend", he beat the crap out of him! Yay! Sweet sweet revenge. He knocked out a few teeth, smashed his nose and abit more.

--------

Another friend and me was into skateboarding. We had this really good skateboard (as we could afford one we shared), but it was really _big_, we could easily skate two on it as one stood in the front and the other kicked it forward. We live right next to a few nice places to skate and we decided to get up on those hills and skate back home.. As we both got tired from skating all day, we decided to "Hey, let's just sit on the skateboard instead". Great idea that worked perfect! Until any curves as it was impossible to stay on the board! We didn't know this and if we knew we would probably not even care!

We started to ride down the hill.. Great fun! We laughed until we saw that we were on a crashcourse into a biiiiiiiiig stone. While trying to avoid to crash w noticed that it was impossible to steer.. We smashed into the stone, my friend landed first and as he sat behind me.. He had the worst crash, It sounded like he had some major problems breathing.. I smashed my head into the ground, causing me another concussion and headache for 1.5 months after the bloody crash!

----------

My brother and I had seen a movie about knight and swordfights! "COOL!" as we tried to find anything that would look like like swords!

We found a pair of "bolts" from an construction site just next to were we lived. These things were long and had a sharp point! Fun fun fun! We started to fight with our new swords and we laughed and laughed until my brother smashed the bolt from my hand and then was about to "kill me" (remember, this was just only play). I took an step forward which wasn't anything my brother had thought about while he charged at me! The bolt smashed my eyebrow open.. It didn't hurt that much but it took a few stitches before it would heal!

------

The day after new year's eve. My brother, myself and a friend would go out and try to find any firework that didn't work the night before. We was really lucky! We found 4 biiiiig rockets and a few other smaller fireworks!

"Ohh, it's time to make an bomb!" - We were really happy when we started to disassemble the rockets and making sure we got all the "gunpowder" out! We got really much! "Wow! Let's blow something up in the forrest! YAY!" however as we didn't have any fuse whatsoever to lit the thing with I came up with the brilliant idea that; "If I take the lighter and lay next to the "bomb" and try to lit it and if it blows up I would be safe as I am on the ground (and as everyone has seen on Van Damme-action movies, if you're close to the ground you aint hurt abit!)" "Great idea!" "Yeah, you do that" was the comments I got from my idea.

After trying to set the bomb of for like 5 minutes I got bored and went back home, fetching a smaller firework that I wanted to save. I got back up to the forrest and as I had tried to get the bomb to explode for five minutes i thought to myself; Ärsch, if I put this on the bomb and lit that and then the bomb it probably will go off!.

I did that, the thing was that the small firework had a really really really short fuse and I didn't expekt it to go off with just that small "homemade fuse", but it did. As we didn't pack the "gunpowder" it wasn't a big boooooom that we wanted. Just more of "fffFFffFFffwwwwWHhhHIUIIIiiiIIiiiiIIiiSSSsssSSSSCCCchcccccCHhhHH"-effect! As my brother and friend stood about ~25 meters away from me. I could hear their "happyscreams"; WOW! COOL! WOOOOOW!

But as I stood just above the bloody bomb I was engulfed in the flames.. I burnt my face and _all_ of my hair in my face and ~50% of my hair in my head. As the smoke began to clear and I was screaming (mostly in fear acctually)my brother realised that; Uh-oh! We're in trouble now! and when he saw me that I wasn't that hurt he came up with the brilliant idea of cutting my hair as that was the only thing that would be the evidence against us from our parents! That was the first time I had an "tan" in the middle of the winter (more of an.. I been sunbathing for the last few days with no pause whatsoever.. I was so red in my face!) and a mullet!

Might I add that it didn't take long until our parents knew what we had done as people had called the police in fear that someone was trying to set the forest on fire!

I was an wildchild when I was younger and might I add; I've had some major concussions and stitches in my head but.. I am still smrt.. I mean smart! Hoho.

Jase, I would have to lean toward pussy given those two descriptors of your persona...

;)

Hel Old Vantaa Man, is that Heino in your avatar? I'm going to have fucking horrible nightmares from the yodeling days of my childhood! Arrghhh!!!

Regarding the chafed testicle, my desk at the office is quite large, with sharp ass corners. My office is small, and proximal to my desk is my office refrdigerator (yes, I know, I eat alot) so it crowds the corner of my desk where I must enter/exit. Lo and behold I was in a hurry and BAM!!! There goes the chafing. I don't really consider business slacks any type of protection so I just as well should have been nude.

A picture of the ordeal? Ask and ye shall receive. I'll wait until the bruise is fully formed, oh yes it's brusing, big time.

Nothing really serious, though possibly most distressing - a few years ago - crushed my hand sideways under a a pile of heavy boxes - broke a few bones in it - distressing only because I was really worried about whether it would recover enough to still play keys - thankfully its just a bit stiff in the cold now, wide stretches on keys can sometimes ache a little, but otherwise ok :)

Otherwise the usual collection of teenage bike crashes etc...

-Alex. Heino. Indeed. Your mother used to play that to you..! Cool!

-Jesus, Sebastian. I'll have to get some karate lessons in before I come over to Stockholm. Or get a gun. I'll clearly need some protection! You're fucking mental!

;-)
Matt

Ärsch, no need for a gun! These stories are dated from when I was a child. It seemed like nothing would stop me back then but today.. Heck, even if it's too cold outside it stops me! Hoho.

Another story, which I don't know would count as a "accident" or injury in that way that it was caused by me or is rather "funny".

I was badly beaten by a teacher.. He was about ~20X cm long and oh say.. 12X kg! I was puny ~14X cm long and weighed about.. ~4X-something kilos?.

He strangled me so I passed out twice (!) and sat on my chest so my friends thought that I died as I couldn't breath. He almost broke my ribs - He managed to damage muscles in my chest, stomach and arm (which took me almost a year to recover from!). He bruised my legs pretty bad and I suffered from pain in my neck for almost a year after the attack..

I was completly blue-ish (think: The smurf's and you'll get the picture) in colour around my neck, chest and stomach for ~3 weeks but it took almost another month to get back to my "normal" colour.

I did press charges against him but as a kid trying to get an adult acctually convicted is.. a big fat 0! It doesn't matter how much evidence you got, it's just impossible.. I was examined by an coronor (!) to record the damage I recived during this beating I got. She stated that it was "matter a fact that Sebastian did survive the horrible beating he endured under the ~1.5 hour long and brutal attack is a miracle. He has recived multiple injuries to his torso, neck, abdomen, arms and legs". (I did find the paperwork from back when I pressed charges against him and I found it quite hard to acctually read about it). As it we went into court to fight this, he "won" as the charges was dropped as my "statement wasn't good enough and my witnesses (the same age as me) couldn't either be an reliable witness to the attack and therefor Olle XXXXXXXXXXX is no longer a suspect for the attack on Sebastian XXX"

He didn't just cause me some major physical damage but as he managed me to be full of anger and hate (towards him.. and yes, people that acctually reminds me of him but as he had a pretty weird apperance I've only seen one that reminded of him).

Yay! What an positive aura I reflect on this topic! No worries though, I don't think about it anymore and.. heck, this thread is all about the pain, oh the pain!

Sebastian, if I were you, I'd look that motherfucker up and pay him a little visit Clockwork Orange style. Any sick mothrfucker who would do that to a kid is in grave need of a serious ass whipping, preferably within an inch or two of his life. Jesus, what a horrible story! We're glad you made it through that one monkey-brother!!!

Righty right, Brother Alex! Poor Sebby’s Pee and Em obviously didn’t plach about it too much, so Brother Sebski should take matters into his own rookers.

Take my soviet. Give that grazzy bratchny the acquaintance of your nosh and razrez his Keeshkas and delight as the rivers of lovely krovy flow! Then a good tolchock to the yarbles and off you runny run run before the Millicent arrive. Get yourself home for a nice plate of eggiweg on kleb washed down with a nice tass of chai and it’s off to zasnoot, all before 10pm.
;-)

Alex: I'd love to do that _but_ I've got other things to think about these days! Besides I got a in a few good punches when we had our little rumble in the school! As one might add I did fight alot as an kid so I knew how to defend myself against people in my size and abit older but he was too strong for me.
Still glad that I did fight back - after he had strangled me it was then and there it was obvious that I had to fight back to acctually survive and getta hell outta that school.

As I said, we fought for over 1.5 hours and mostly it was me that got the punches but I got in a few also.. I know I smashed his glasses and smashed an clock he had recived for good (!) work with kids!

It didn't do any major damage as he did onto me, still however he got a few bruises and was hopefully scared as fuck when the pupils from schools in the area started to come by this particular school just screaming his name outside! I also "heard" (hoho) that his car didn't have such an nice paintjob or whole tires a few months after the attack..

He got fired from the school after my mother and father pressed charges against the school, but from what I've heard he did acctually get an job with "troublemakers" in a "specialschool"! Insane!

As this incident was about 15 years ago.. I don't think he has lived to this day as his breakfast and lunch was McDonalds! (He was an fat fuck)..

But yes, I'd love to get an "real" revenge.. but he would probably flee like an scared little pig if he saw me coming as he seemed to only was tough enough to acctually smack around little kids and kids older than +12, he usually just flee the classroom if they started to argue with him! But yes, I'd love to smack him around today aswell.. I am not saying anything else than that..

He was disliked before this and hated afterwards! Noone of the pupils would listen to him. Our "real" teacher also lost all of her respect from the pupils - The guy that beat me was an computer/IT-teacher.

I did acctually meet my "real" teacher (that just stood by when he strangled me), she was; "Oh my god! It's you! It's really you! How aaaaaaaaaaaare you?! I am so glad that..", "Woah! Stop right there and don't even take one step closer you little whore or else I am forced to acctually be really..", "Sebastian! why?! WHAT DID I DO TO YOU?!?!?!" (I might add that she just stood by when he strangled me.. I might add that she refused to witness for me as she turned side as she had an little afternoonfun with Olle that beat me, I might also add that once he attacked me.. She called my parents 3 days later and said, I belive that Sebastian was the agressive part in this fight and that he needs care and you're not good parents and I belive that Olle is innocent and that he did the right thing), So as she took an step further towards me I did spit in her face. She started to cry and I started to laugh.. She called in sick the next following weeks from school as my mate's little sister had her as an teacher and from what I've also heard she died a few years back. I don't shed any tears for that - She could have stopped him!

Matsa: As I still live here where it happened and the schools are today Sweden's worst schools (Loads of violence and noone acctually graduating!) I will never ever let Nova go in these schools! and if I had an tank I'd smash thrue those building with peace in my mind.

Im injury free more or less, all of my bones are intact.
I have been having this burning pain in the side of my chest muscle when bench pressing too much wight at the gym (i cant get pass 100kg at the moment) this shit started 6 months ago and still hasnt healed even tho i took a month of rest.

Heavy, flat barbell bench presses will tear your rotator cuffs up, Tomer. Trust me, I felt the pain in both arms in the past 2.5 years.

You are MUCH better off doing giant sets with dumbbells:

(1) Flat Dumbbell Bench Press
(2) Flat Dumbbell Bench Flyes
(3) Cross Bench Pull Overs

OR

(1) Incline Dumbbell Bench Press
(2) Incline Dumbbell Bench Flyes
(3) Cross Bench Pull Overs

Go through each set 1, 2, 3 with no rest, then take a minute or two off and go do some calf raises (because no one's calves are ever big enough, unless you're me). Repeat four times, then go off and see how much you can bench with a barbell...not much I bet!

Save your joints my friend. Your muscles will heal, your tendons, ligaments, and joints will fuck you over way before your muscles give out.

It happened to me at 28!!!

Ahhhhh the Droogy days. I miss bashing old Georgie Boy's face in. And now it's time to listen to the Ludwig Van... ;) A priceless film. My mother detested it because I watched it every day after school for 2 weeks straight. At that point in my life I was running around on weekends throwing eggs, tipping over garbage cans, pulling mailboxes out of the ground, pushing furniture into swimming pools, and being a nasty little neighborhood menace all together. Such are the early years of adolescence when little boys are so frustrated becasue they have a whole lot of testosterone to deal with but no job, no car, and no girlfriend to help curb its power. You are stranded in your town, you are frustrated, and by golly some how you've got to let the tension out. I sure am glad I never found my Dad's thermal underwear and a top hat...LOL

Hoho.. I just didn't get it until now about the "A Clockwork Orange"-'quotes'. Its an great movie for sure, but it's completly insane! I can't really say if it's good insane (i.e; Look at me.. I am an golden god-insane!) or bad insane (i.e; Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeereeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee's Johnny!!!!-insane)

last april i had a fu**in quad accident in the desert. A 2nd quad was running too fast behind me, hit me and we both fell on the ground. And when falling, the only obvious reflex i've had was to put my right hand first on the ground to weaken the impact, and bang. The consequence were some minor injuries but a fu**** forearm. I still suffer from a tendinitis, i think it is sticked to me forever.
I cannot practise piano easily anymore, especially when it comes to playing fast with the right hand.
Besides that, thanks god, bones still intact & never had stitches!

<wince> Ouch. That's horrible! Nice to see you back Hatembr. How's life otherwise?

Ok mine aren't as good but.

1) When I was younger I was walking over a bridge 12 feet above a footpath (on wrongside of safety barrier) started to speak to someone on the path and body followed my vision, ended up face first in to ground, but bounced and also hit my leg before all coming down in one big heap. Scrapped all the skin off my forehead, samshed my front tooth, woke the next morning to 2 black eyes that were swollen shut. Took 6 weeks to get over the worst. But everyone who saw it still thinks it's the funniest thing ever, (not for me) I now have a slightly squint foot, but only noticed when I tried to snowboard and my foot started to hurt when trying to keep it straight.

2) When enjoing a wank from a girl when I was 17 in my car she got carried away and pulled too hard on my skin, it then ripped from the bit that attatches the foreskin to the top all the way down until it is even. The pain was bad but not half as bad as trying to pee after it. (Explain that to your Mum when she asks whats wrong. I know have something that resemble the skin under a roosters beak.

3)Punched someone and broke my knuckle.

4) Was sitting up the top of a tree, next to a dead one. Friend decided he wanted to come up and see what I was looking at, as he did I had to strech my leg to another branch almost the splits. The prick put all his wait on one of the braches, it snapped and we both fell, all the way down about 25 feet, I hit every branch (with legs still open) I fell in to a field and removed the branches only to feel the dull pain and then feel something dripping, dropped my trousers and My balls were bleeding, but my friend was still up the tree, hanging upside down from the ankle stuck in the tree. I soooo wanted to leave him. Balls ok now (No kidz and 27, hmmm ihope their ok)

5)Took a bad turn on mushrooms in my house, stood at top of stairs in my house and dived head first down them, (You know I think I made it all the way. Smashed up house. Woke up with grazes, cuts, brusies. Broken nose from my dad when he came in and found house smashed. Man I hate mushrooms. Seriously don't mess with wild shrooms (well not a brew with over 1500 in it)

Think that's it

Damn Bro!!!

I'd say your right at the top of the list in many regards!

You might want to get your sperm count checked, just in case.

Take care,

-Alex

goooooood lord . . .
these stories are horrible!!

Alex
I check it myself almost daily, just keep falling asleep after counting to 10 :)

Nut's not worrying my too much at the moment, will wait until I'm ready for kids, then I have the best excuse for a mid life crisis. (New synths car and fast women, with no birth control, saying that my usual women I'll probably still need disease control)

Saying that Once I had a dose of genital warts from some dirty bitch (Were a bloody condom!) You know they freeze you knob with liquid nitrogen, then put some acid gunk on and then this guy used another thing. (Later spoke to another Dr that told me normal practice is just 1 of them, but my Dr knew best ;( ) Then they tell you not to forget to wash it off in 8 hours!!!!!
Well one day I forgot and about 9 hours sitting at dinner with my folks things started to get a little hot down there so I rushed to toilet to clean myself, OUCH!!!!! !! It took about 6 weeks of this once a week. I'm all clear now and assured all is fine down there.

But man I'm always safe now.

So now you know you'll never get the 3o3 style pictures from me lol

Hmmm did I really just admit that.

oh and the dirty bitch contacted me through friends re-united a couple of years back asking how I was and wondering if we could meet..... Well she got told, even funnier when telling a bloke at the place I worked at that time a women asked if I know her daughter.... lol I never had the heart to tell her she waas the same girl I had just been talking about. Now I work 80 miles from my home town ;)

Bishop: I've also suffer from an peeled banana if I say so! But that story is so insane I couldn't tell it here.. and hopefully from telling my other stories you know this one is bad! People still laugh about it as it could be an scene directly from "American Pie"

I've got a major scar from the accident! But I've been lucky and never gotten any genital warts or anything like that!

Doc: Admit it! You only think these stories are horrible as these are everyday events for you, and you'd always thought that "smashing me nuts while lighting my torso on fire" is a good first-date option?! Hehe.

Hey another great story, which I can't tell is an accident or what yet;

Last Saturday I was invited to come party with my tattooartist as they had their "1-year anniversary" He has been tattooing for the last 15 years but never had his own studio.. They've also started with piercing! So I get there, I promise Ausa that I won't drink that much. I drink two beers for 2 hours..

I wake up 05:20 in the bathtub still in my tshirt and boxershorts.. I wake up because I accidently turn the cold water on!, first thought: Holy mother.. Now i've got some major things to explain! It did hurt quite alot from my nipple.. Ärsch, I just wanted to get to bed again..

I woke up around noon-ish.. I still had that pain in my nipple when all of the sudden I get this flash from yesterday! I pierced my nipple! I pull up my shirt thinking "Nah, I didn't do that.." Well.. I did! Now I got both my nipples pierced (which is great.. *wink wink hubba hubba* if you're ladies know how to get the freak on.. which I mean hanging you from the ceiling while chanting rhytmic A-B-C-D-E-F.. How I wonder what come's next and then a smack on you're bottom and off you go to orgasmowonderland!)

I had such an hangover on Sunday from the day before, and yes. I had quite much explaining to do.. It's insane how I didn't remember anything as from what I recall I only had ~6 small beers (which is nothing really)! I talked to my tattooartist yesterday; "Erhm, you were pretty weird.. First you were fine.. Didn't even look like you were drunk and 10 minutes later you couldn't even talk".

Never get any bodymods while under influence of alcohol or else you'll end up in your bathtub, still wearing your underwear and later on find out that you womited all over the place..

Some amazing stories here. I like Seb's Beavis and Butthead escapade in the hospital where his mate tried to split his skull with a rock!

Alex's leg in a rabbit hole makes my buttcheeks clench each time I even think about it.

But brewing 1500 mushrooms and flying off the top of the stairs.. Plus the rest of these confessions from Chris Bishop here... I nearly had an accident laughing so much.

ARISE SIR BISH!

I must admit I should keep more secrets, but feck it, life's for living.

Must say shrooms was probably worst experience of my life, but the dive down the stairs is still so clear in my head 12 years on. I counted the stairs and there are 13, unlucky for some lol.

Safe to say now I don't take shrooms, don't dive from large heights and only sleep with one clean(ish) women my wellies to bed ;)

It was a horrible Skateboarding accident. The worst one I ever had hands down, and that counts crushing nuts a few times on handrails - now that says something!