Dear Brothers and Sisters of the UAV,

It would be my great honor to serve this virtual community of blasphemers as a moderator. Photos of my own misconduct? Do I hear calls to unearth my PAST dirt? Let me assure you that there is no need to dig far. I am a true believer in being an open book. So, please take a moment to enjoy the following images from my post participation on this great forum:

Let's not forget who "dropped the bomb" in the poo thread last year - yours truly.


Who cares so much about truth that he immediately pointed out the homo-curious tendencies of the Australian rugby team? - me again:


What type of IQ should have a moderator of the UAV posess?


I spend much of each weekend selflessly answering posts on this forum because I know that waiting for a response is like digging out one's wisdom teeth with a spoon:


Does anyone here appreciate the social value of a "big huge" like I do?


If so, I'm your top pick for mod!

The people need a strong moderator, one who won't take any shite from a disrespectful spammer or a wanna-be troll from the TI forum. This forum needs for its next moderator to be a:


And please don't believe Mr. Matsa, I do not blow donkeys, I just woke up one day and found this little fella' in my can:


What will I spend the people's money on?

TICKETS TO AMSTERDAM BABY, YEEEAHHH!!!!

Do I promise to uphold the virtues of a civilized web-diplomat while moderating this board?

NO WAY IN HELL!!!

What will happen if you don't vote for me?

I will hunt you down baby, I will lock onto to your IP address, and it's OVER!!!

So have a heart, do the right thing, vote for me, and remember, don't get mired in my past dirt...look forward to my future dirt!!!!

Regards,

Well it's looking like it's going to be a close race and things really are heating up for this election. Many fertile men fighting bodily discharge and all for the position!

I very much like the "don't get mired in my past dirt...look forward to my future dirt" slogan. Nice job Alex! Something that the whole family can abide by.

Mmm, so far it's looking good for the poo-master himself, but what about the other candidates?

Remember "poo" is not a four letter word and pictures of your own WILL help your chances! :D

Good luck to all in the running. And remember if there are any last minute candidates they can be added by contacting admin.

I'd like to thank my learned colleague and opponent in this election for his insightful comments and pictures above.

If it's in the interests of a unified board, I'll be quite happy to step down and let the right honourable member from Florida take the position.

But fellow OTters, please just ask yourselves this:

DOES ALEX HALL REALLY HAVE THE SHOE-SIZE FOR THE JOB?

What I wanna know from both you matsa and Alex. What is your stand on illegal users on this board?

Sebastian,

Illegal users of what? Software? Music? Viruses?

Please clarify the question and I will respond in full after conferring with my attorney and public relations committee.

Regards,

-Alex

Send the fekkers all back to wherever it is they just keep coming from.

There are absolutely NO JOBS to be found anywhere these days working for less than minimum wage with no health insurance and in filthy or dangerous conditons.

Alex: Illegal everything, illegal posters/software/people/aliens/food! Matsa has a really good point here.. We outta ban everything and everyone!

What is your point of view on.. apes?

I'd rather focus on the issues than talk about about my opponents.

Oh, that gotta hurt.. right Alex?

:D

Although some people do actually focus on Alex as an "issue".

So where are the rest of the candidates?